Sometimes I just get really antsy. Or excited. Or happy. And I just want to punch someone in the face as hard as I can.
What if I told you that when I said that the sharpie band on my finger is my temporary wedding ring from when I secretly eloped last night, I was being serious?
#sarcasm
#MARRIAGE
#I don't even know
Don’t be silly, I’m just curious.
At my parent’s house, washing my laundry. The kids are all in bed so there’s nothing fun to do, so I’m taking pictures of myself instead.
My brother, my best friend, my partner in crime, is gone. Took him up to school today. I won’t see him again until October. This is the first time in my life that we have been truly apart.
#I don't deal with change very well
#bestfriend
#i hate everything
#I don't even know
#why do people have to leave?
I am having a really hard time with this. Why do people have to leave?
"Sometimes I’m just sad."
So I’m going to continue to hole myself up in my room drinking coffee and listening to Disney songs while painting.
#my life
#I don't even know
"Silence bears down; a cacophony of loneliness
as I sit, surrounded
by empty canvases and a palette full
of inarticulate desire.
Thunder threatens to break the hazy light of seeming calm
as it settles into the night air,
reminding me to close my window.
But the weight of emptiness paralyzes my limbs,
though my hand closes around a paintbrush.
And though I sit bound by stillness,
colors dance behind open lids
to the beat of my heart pulsing in my left wrist:
strokes of crimson regret fading in and out under the overlay
of a wistful moon’s azure reflection.
But the brightest patterns dissipate into hesitation
before my tired fingers can distinguish their form.
And I remain alone,
but for the hum of night whistling through my open window,
and a lap-full of blank canvas:
a testament to indecision."
as I sit, surrounded
by empty canvases and a palette full
of inarticulate desire.
Thunder threatens to break the hazy light of seeming calm
as it settles into the night air,
reminding me to close my window.
But the weight of emptiness paralyzes my limbs,
though my hand closes around a paintbrush.
And though I sit bound by stillness,
colors dance behind open lids
to the beat of my heart pulsing in my left wrist:
strokes of crimson regret fading in and out under the overlay
of a wistful moon’s azure reflection.
But the brightest patterns dissipate into hesitation
before my tired fingers can distinguish their form.
And I remain alone,
but for the hum of night whistling through my open window,
and a lap-full of blank canvas:
a testament to indecision."
Something I wrote.
#poetry
#writing
#loneliness
#love
#desire
#poem
#I don't even know
"What if the thing I call Red is actually Blue— but you saw it, and think it’s Red, too? And everyone else sees our Red as Blue, but we didn’t know it. So we believed and lived as if it was Red, which to us would be true. Even though it’s actually Blue."
I found a little thought journal that I had written when I was 16, and this is one of the musings caught between the pages.
#quote
#Red
#Blue
#thoughts
#musings
#I don't even know
